When you are woman it not easy to express your desire to have sex now. Centuries of taboos and women rights suppression have made most women passive when it comes to sex. In Africa women have crafted over centuries clever schemes to send explicitly coded message meaning “I want sex today!” to their men.
Here are few of these schemes with quick explanation:
1. Tell the man “Come back early” when he would be living home, and, cook a special meal or the man favorite meal for the evening. Keep in mind that sex is only a night business in many traditional societies around the world.
2. Help the man undress when he is back from work, clean his face with her sheet. The kind gesture and the physical contact done in a pleasant manner would arouse the man desire.
More sophisticated women would ask the man to sit, remove their shoes and bring a bucket of warm water to clean and massage their feet.
In the southern east part of Togo, there is a traditional education reserved to girls on how to domesticate men, which include elaborate process to make a man as obedient as a dog.
3. Remove the man towel from bathroom or provide the shower bucket with water but without the man towel. When the man would need the towel or ask for it, she would bring it with suggesting messages.
4. Put the pillows at the feet side of the bed, when dressing the bed in the morning, meaning something has to be different this night.
5. Serve Very hot water in the shower bucket for the man.
In City or village, in majority people still take shower from a bucket. Serving very hot water would either lead the man to complain or ask for a cooling water. The message is to say “dude, I’m very hot, I need a cooler”.
6. Put her scarf on the door. “Man, I have lost my mind, I need a treat” that’s the message. Usually, the woman would made her hair in a fashionable way in the first place, and use some face powder for special effect. The attractiveness would compel the man to cool the fire before prying eyes would start sending dubious messages.
7. Drop cloth on the floor when walking by the man, and quickly recover it to protect her intimate parts. This is a very widespread methods in villages and traditional families. It is also used as a way to send message to lovers or for courting. There is more art dnd variety to this that I can describe here.
8. In societies where women wear Beads, the ladies would change their wearing to a new color, in most cases yellow or red, and would move them above the hip, a bit over the belly, and would slightly touch them or play with them while interacting with the target man.
9. Wear a red color cloth at the end of the day, or the favorite color of the husband. It also usual that woman would be get naked and only tie a very light, one piece of cloth, just above the breast, and walk away from home or surrounding for a short time. This would awaken the man suspicion and instinct to protect territory, which would lead him to act faster.
10. If all above methods won’t work, women would take any opportunity in large group to complain to his man like following “I’ve been cooking for you but you don’t eat my food”. This message mean you don’t fuck me anymore, and is a kind a double signal: one as ultimatum to the man to act, and another is to signal other males in the group she is considering alternatives.
These practices are more from western Africa. It’s possible that there more, and many different ones in other parts of Africa.
As for women to show explicit desire for sex would made them look vulgar, untrustworthy or just like sex objects only good to play with (not someone worthy marrying), these subtleties have been invented, I guess, to smooth things out within the constraints of the bigotry in our traditional and modern societies.
As for men, the usual and most desirable practice to express their desire to have sex is to tell the woman in the morning or before she would start cooking in the evening to “prepare for tonight” or “come to see me when the kids would be sleeping”.
Are there such kind of practices in your country or society?